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Saturday, May 5, 2012

In Remembrance

This is a post to mark the anniversary of my mother's birth. She is no longer with us as she passed four years ago.  It is from her that I get my strength, my artistic abilities, the features of my face and my voice.

No matter what difficulties we were facing my mother taught me that it was a persons perception that was the key to endurance. If there was but a finger full of water in a glass most people would see that glass as almost empty. My mother would take that finger full of water, pour it into a shot glass and say "See pet, your glass is full."  

When she was sixty-five my mother picked up a paintbrush on a whim and never having painted before put brush to canvas and began painting landscapes in oil.  She had a natural gift that lay dormant and one day bloomed full. 

I speak with my mothers voice and laugh with her laugh.  So much so that I can bring my little sisters to heel with a few words and make my Auntie cry when she hears me laugh. And when I look in the mirror, I see her eyes looking out through mine.

I am unable to visit her at the cemetery and lay fresh flowers on her grave, but I give her these photos in remembrance.

Mary Theresa O'Leary May 3, 1932-January 11, 2008





I miss you Mom from your loving daughter.


I will be posting a miniature on Monday. It is my first critter, a Rabbit Huntsman and I am really enjoying working on him.  The figure will post from Monday through Wednesday. During that time, I will be blog hopping and reading blogs and asking gamers and painters that do not follow me for input. Although this is intimidating for me to do, as a new painter I must do it.  When I posted my knight I asked over 20 people that I did not know if they would come and critique me.  One responded. I thank you. 
To those of you who so kindly follow me and comment I thank you and appreciate your input.  I am not asking for a shout out from anyone. This is something I must do on my own if I am to be accepted in the painting community. So if you see my signal repeatedly hitting your page, I'm rummaging through your followers.

All photos have been digimarked. If any of these photos are downloaded I will receive notification and I will request that Digimark trace the photo. A digimarked photo can be traced directly to the computer of the person doing the download. 






78 comments:

  1. That's really sweet side of you, Anne! I am sure your mother is very proud of you.

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    1. Thank you Marco, I was always proud of her.

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  2. The loved one may be gone but the memories never die.

    May you cherish your memories of your mother until you too, go to the better place where she is waiting for you.

    All the best Anne.

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    1. Thank you Kingsley. I know where she is and I know we'll be together again and my memories of her are good. I'm not at all sad, I just wanted to honor her memory.

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  3. That was beautiful...thinking of you today Anne!

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    1. Thank you Mel. I hope you didn't sample all those drinks you posted last night!

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  4. I feel sorry for your mother. I and my mother have our share of fights and arguments too, but in the end, the fact that she cared for me for 16 years...

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    1. Thank you Kbud but there's nothing to feel sorry about. She went when it was time and she was completely at peace. We were very close and never really argued. She was too nice to really work up a good head of steam and get mad at.

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  5. I'm sure your Mum would love the flowers, whether they're real or photos. I lost my Mum in 2007, it still hurts but the memories are all still there.

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    1. It's hard isn't it Ray. Both my parents are now gone and I'm the eldest female. I'm way too young to be the family matriarch, but I am. I have flowers named for all the women in my family and plant things in memory of the women who have passed. That's why my gardens are so big!

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  6. I can't even imagine how losing a mother must feel and honestly I hope it's a long time until I have to. Great post Anne, I too love the flowers as well.

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    1. I hope it's a long time too as well Matthew. My mom was ready and so it was easy letting her go in the end because she needed to go. She came out of her coma long enough to say goodbye to her children and two hours later passed peacefully.

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  7. Today is my dating/wedding anniversary. Twelve/two years and counting.

    Knowing that we married on a day when someone who was and is so obviously loved makes me feel (all the more) that we chose a good day for our big day.

    Thank you as always for sharing yourself.

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    1. It will be 23 for me and The Hubby this year. I always forget our anniversary and he loves it. He gets to spend months telling all his friends how horrible his wife is for forgetting. I do it on purpose just to make him happy.

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  8. It was my parents who helped shape who I am today, and I don't know what I'll do without them. Your mum sounds like she was an amazing person and it's sad she's gone :( It seems like painting might run in the family though. I think you should cut yourself some slack with the miniatures. Francis at least should critique you. That's also a pretty neat trick with the pictures there.

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    1. The painting, the writing, the singing and the photography all run in the family as does the gardening. And it all comes from my moms side of the family too. I'm the only one who plays drums. I have no idea where that came from.

      I can't cut myself slack on the painting. I have to get good enough to earn the respect of the painters around here and I have to do it on my own or it won't be respect. It will be owing someone something and I can't tolerate that.

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    1. Thank you Templar. That was well said and appreciated.

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  10. I often feel I am so lucky to have my mum in my life and living close to me.
    Sending you hugs and wishing you only happy memories of the times you had with your mum

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    1. All my memories are happy ones and I spent the last three years of my moms life living down the road from her so I have no regrets.

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  11. I don't know about you, Anne, but I'm afraid of dying. I'm also afraid of my Mom dying on me one day. It's something most of us don't want to think about, let alone discuss in a non-academic way. I'm annoyed by people saying it's normal or the way things go - 'It's a part of life and shit happens' - but that doesn't mean we shouldn't take a minute or so to really think about what a loved ones death means, or your own. It makes me want to live even more, is what it means to me. Just like you - and I'm sure many, many people out there - I can hear my Mom's voice when I'm grumpy or being difficult or, occasionally, enthusiastic; I hear her talk to her cats the way I do... little things, you know. Little but big.

    Thanks for sharing that, Anne. :)

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    1. I'm not at all afraid of death. I was pretty damn close after being hit by that tram and I held on only for the Hubby. I remember hearing him say "Stay, I need you." And I fought my way back. And for many years I wished I hadn't held on. The leaving seemed easier than the staying. But I know what you mean. People do trivialize something as important as death by repeating tired cliche's that have no real meaning.

      I am however now into the idea of living and enjoying the act of being alive and in the moment. You only go around once so you might as well have a hell of a laugh while you do it.

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    2. You are making me cry. That is wonderful.

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    3. I'm with Anne too. I'm not afraid of dying either. When something horrid and truly deep happens to you, you suddenly get a goal in your life, and you know that you will go through life fighting. And as crazy as it sounds fighters don't think about death. They've been too close to it and know that the point is in making the life you live worth existing and not thinking about it ending.
      Living in the moments is also a great concept, because small minutes make hours, days make years, so why wouldn't we enjoy each little particle of time with full lungs?

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    4. It puts things in perspective, the acute awareness of your mortality does if you don't leave it too late to notice. It's easier to take life moment by moment rather than looking too far ahead at something that hasn't happened yet. I've stopped doing too much of that as it ruins the now. I'll suck the marrow of the bones of life before I'll lie about miserable feeling sorry for myself.

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    5. that's true, Annzie, if you don't breathe every day, why do you live at all? So breath in the fresh air which is out there even when it's too hot or when the storm is around.

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    6. That is something I'm learning, I have to stop damn well thinking so friggin much about what is to come, I do that waaaaaaay to much. A lot happier when I just take each day as it is, just have to get into that mind frame I guess, but it is hard when so much crap keeps going through this head of mine..haha

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    7. Right now you've got things to think about cat and places to go and people to meet. You'll be living in the moment soon enough I think. And a good moment I hope it is.

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    8. Technically the cat will be at nanny's for such an ordeal. So he'll be too stressed out to make a rhyming response to the comments those few days. Sure the alliance will run amuck, but oh well have to unplug once in a while. Should be fun to say the least, be nice to shut this damn brain off though sometimes.

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    9. @Patt - That makes two.
      @Anne - Thanks, Anne. :)

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    10. Yeah it is a lot easier said than done.

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  12. Beautiful flowers to remember your mother with. I'm sure shes looking down smiling.

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  13. I know she is Matt of that I am cetain.

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  14. ((hugs)) nice rememberance of your mother anne....still have mine but my wife lost her mom several years ago, we will be marking that day soon enough....peace to you...and have a great weekend!

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    1. Thank you Brian, I'll be out among my flowers here in a few minutes as it's a lovely day for it.

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  15. Cute and thoughtful post as usual Anne. Your mom sounds awesome, from you we can realize how wonderful she had been. She gifted her awesomeness to you. I wish I had same relationship with my mother. Me and my mom are totally contrast to each other.
    Your mother would have so proud of you. I loved this post.
    Your digimark warning reminds me of Zuckerberg peeping Tom post of ABFTS.

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    1. Oh God that Zuckerberg thing was so creepy. How could those boys do that to us? We'e all so nice and they go and make us retch? The horror of the Zuck will be with us always!!

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  16. your mother was a true and proud Irish warrior lady, and by warrior I don't mean what superficial people would mean!
    Perspective is all, dahling, all! You know that about me already!

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    1. It's so good to have you back Dezzie, we missed you so much. The Alliance is now reunited and can stand as one against the forces of evil!!

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  17. Say it with flowers, and that's what you did Anne! It's the best way to show that you're still loving her!

    PS: I'm looking forward to monday ;-)

    Greetings
    Peter
    http://peterscave.blogspot.com/

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  18. A great tribute to your mother, sure she is appreciating it. Mom is stil around being a pain in my rear at times..lol...but dad is long gone. Death has never really bothered me though. I mean I will fight like hell to stay alive for as long as possible but when it comes it comes. I just hope I go boom or something and it isn't some long drawn out process. I try to look at everything as half full although it can be a pain in the arse sometimes to do, especially when crummy things keep happening around you, but one must go on. Until that time comes. You know I don't think I've ever been too upset over a human dying, a pet yes, humans no. Hmmm no sure that is a good thing..lol...but as long as one lives their lives how they want there should be nothing to fear about death, it's when you get trapped in some piss pot life that one really fears death because they have done nothing they wanted. And now Pat is kicked from the computer with all this nicey nice junk.

    The alliance can be back all they want, it never worked and if you want to find death quick, come to bush number three and I'll have my viking woman sit on thee. And your suffering at the hands of a cat with tons up his rear and pringle cans of poo will be over.

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    1. I'm not afraid to go either but I'm in no big hurry. I grieve my pets passing, but I grieve harder and longer for people.

      You're viking woman is such a shame to her people that she'll never see the halls of Valhalla! Curse you, I send a pox upon thee. May a thousand camels invade your arse cat.

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    2. Well if the thousand camels come up my bum, at least I'll get a good long humping.

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    3. You're viking woman might get jealous and clap your ears with her trash can lids. But you'd love that wouldn't you.

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    4. An ear ringing and a good humping. i'd be hooked on such a feeling.

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  19. If your mother was much like you, then she was truly a wonderful and unique person. Telling the world what she meant to you means just as much--if not more--than leaving actual flowers on an actual grave.

    Can't wait to see your finished rabbit huntsman!

    xoxo

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    1. I'm working on the rabbit now. I'm trying to make him look ferocious but I'm calling him Little Rabbit Riding Hood. His cape will be as red as the blood of his foe!

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  20. I'm very glad my mom is still here and I'm sorry that your's has passed. I'm picking up some flower pots today (nice ones) so she can grow some flowers a bit closer to the house because I can see that the flower garden is going a little wild, time does slow us down. Your flowers are beautiful, I'm sure your mother loves them.

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    1. You're a good son Kris to be doing something thoughtful for your mom. As our parents age we children have to look after them a bit and try to do it so that they don't notice.

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  21. It's nice to recognize in yourself aspects of your mother, or other who raised you. I can see a lot of my grandmother in me, and it's like a connection with the person long after thy're gone. And someone will have that when we're gone too. I would bet your kids have a lot of you in them too- so it all keeps going.

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    1. I have a lot of my gran and my mom in me. My daughter looks like the Hubby, but unfortunately has inherited my temper. She draws and plays keyborda and bass. My son was adopted and I hope I've left a mark on the boy as right now he's out sowing his oats!

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  22. We Irish live and die by what our mothers were and said and I know she was in Heaven a half hour before the devil knew she was dead cailin!

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    1. Go raibh maith agat Angry. And I know she was as she was a Saint.

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  23. My Mom and Dad died within a few years of each other over thirty years ago. I often wonder how life would be different if they were still here with me.
    Your post was very moving.

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    1. I'm sorry to hear that. If they were still around I'm hoping your life would be the richer for it.

      Thank you John

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  24. I've been trying to figure out a way to say this properly and can't seem to find a way...so, I'll just give it a go with this:

    Your adoration of your mom sounds much like mine for my dad, whom I miss terribly. Your tribute to her is beautiful and I know that she is looking down upon you with pride knowing that you continue to shine each and every day. You show us all the talents and optimism that you learned from her and we are grateful. Thank you, Anne and thank you Ms. Mary.

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    1. Mom also had a great sense of humor and a fondness for chicanery. My daughter loves to tell stories about her. All her friends say "Grandma Mary was a baller," "Baller" roughly translated means dangerously cool.

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    2. I've mentioned how close I was to my first husband's dad. I called him dad and he was right there for me when my his son died and then my dad died right after - he was MY dad. Anyway, he was a "Baller" too. My kids talk about him all the time...so do I. He died May 3 2010.

      He made us laugh to no end!! I'm glad your daughter shares stories with her friends. So important!

      Enjoy your rabbit =)

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    3. I remember you telling me about him and how much he helped you after Seniors death.

      My daughter tells her friends the craziest Grandma Mary stories. My mother hated this one family and we never knew why because she wouldn't tell us. So we all had to hate them too. To this day the tradition endures--my daughter hates this womans grandchildren and doesn't need a reason.

      My mom also kept statuary in her garden, which mortified my daughter. My daughter is so scarred over it, she's made me swear never to put a Virgin Mary or a gnome in the garden!

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    4. I love your daughter's loyalty!! That speaks volumes about her and about you too. About how much love all of you share for each other.

      Funny about the statues in the garden. My mom kept statues and now I won't have but one - St. Francis. And that was because Devin insisted LOL

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    5. Every Spring I'm tempted to go out and buy about 20 cheap gnomes while my daughter is at a friends house and stick them in the yard so when she comes home I can hear her scream!!

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    6. OMG, Serbs also have those things, Annzie, traditional family hatreds which are passed on through generations :)
      My grandma from father's side had a snowwhite statue in the garden with a rhinestone crown and seven dwarves around her. She was the queen of bad taste but kids in her neighbourhood loved staring at the scene....
      I used to peel of the rhinestones and pretend they're real diamonds. My grandma hated me for doing that :))))

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  25. Honoring your Mother's memory is a beautiful thing Anne, and just highlights what a sweet person you are.

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    1. Thank you very much Joe. Now when are you going to do another post?

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  26. She left a firm print for us all, and that will continue to live on. I like these posts. You can tell they're from the heart.

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    1. Thank you D4. She was a grand woman and doing something lovely on a weekend helps everyone.

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  27. I know what you are talking about I often see my mother's eyes when I look in the mirror or sometimes I see my brother's eyes which I guess mean we both have mums eyes........lol This is a lovely tribute to your mum the pictures of the photos you have shared with us are wonderful my favourite is the last on such striking red just beautiful

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    1. I'm the spitting image of my mother. And the older I get, the more like her I become.

      My roses just began to open a few days ago. My whites, yellows and reds are blooming but I'm still waiting on the pinks.

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  28. What a nice way to remember your mother!!! It must be very nice to be able to see and hear your mother through yourself :)

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    1. It scares the living hell out my sisters when they piss me off to hear her voice yelling at them though. I use it as a weapon!

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  29. That was gorgeously written. Adding pictures of beautiful flowers just made it even better. I salute your mom for raising such a loving daughter such as you. And I salute you for honoring her memory even after her death.

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    1. Thank you and it's great to have you back on the blogosphere. I missed you and the gorgeous art you post.

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  30. Simply beautiful, Anne.
    Sometimes I miss my parents so much, but I know they are only a Skype away, even though I only get to actually "see" them a couple of times a year. :(

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  31. touching stuff. They say I looked an awful lot like my mom but I never saw it. Until once at my aunts house I saw old school photos of my mother and her siblings from the 1960's. My mom looked like me as a small child wearing a wig. It was hilarious and cute at the same time.

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  32. I't's always good to remember lost ones, last year around this time I attended my grandfathers funereal he was a Colonel in the Army so he got the gun salute forgot how many shots it was, anyway have a great week Anne!

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