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Monday, March 26, 2012

O'Leary Tells Environazi's to Feck Off

Stewart Jeffbaggy of the Guardian recently accused Anne O'Leary, CEO of O'Leary Air of being "evil, by enticing otherwise stay-at-home British and other Europeans to jet around, befouling its' air with carbon emissions."

Word of the insult reached O'Leary while she was in her offices at Shenanigans Pub.  "It's time for a Press Conference!" O'Leary shouted.


A clearly drunken O'Leary stormed up to the podium, slammed down her bottle of gin and yelled at the assembled press. "I've been accused of being evil by the environazi's. For fucks sake, have any of you ever seen what one of these bastards looks like?"

"How can I take a couple of Cheech and Chong's like this seriously?"


"The idea that my Airline is destroying the environment is shite!" O'Leary glared at the press.


"Jesus Christ, my cattle cause more carbon emission than my entire fleet." 


"And besides that, I'm a humanitarian!"  O'Leary shouted, with no apparent segue.  "There hasn't been a world war in over 50 years because people are too busy flying O'Leary Air. Screw Bono, I should get a Nobel Peace Prize!"


The assembled press looked on in horror.


"My airline should also be given credit for the integration of Europe by bringing lots of different cultures to the beaches of Greece, Spain and Italy where they copulate in the interests of pan-European peace."


Following this statement, O'Leary passed out on the stage.

NOTE TO THE HOOLIGANS  I'm having serious trouble trying to integrate keeping this blog afloat while dealing with the realities of taking care of the Hubby and the house.  Right now I'm hoping to stick it out at a decent pace until my blogaversary. In order to do that, I'm going to have to play around with posting times a bit until I find what works for me.  

This is posting at about 1:30 a.m. my time and I can't stay up and wait for the morning crew to post. I've been nearly the first person on all of your pages for the last nine months and I can't do that everyday, so please bear with me.  I'm going to get some shut-eye and I'll be back before 10:00 a.m. EST. 






50 comments:

  1. I wonder how many pubs there are called Shenanigans. That is brilliant. There better be at least one.

    I'd be happy to contribute some airplane carbon. I need cheaper airline tickets! Or win the lottery. Or both.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm trying to go transatlantic with my airline. Cost from US to Europe will be $19.99. But you'll have to pay to go to the loo!

      Delete
    2. Isn't that what those little bags are for?

      Delete
  2. That imaginary airline puts way too much stress on you! <.<

    And woo! There better be something awesome for the bloggiversary! How long is that? I'll just check the archives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know D4, it's the cause of my drinking problem. The blogoversary will be a crazy thank you to all of you guys!!

      Delete
  3. >I'm going to get some shut-eye
    Are you serious? We can't accept that.

    Nice rant btw ;)

    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know, I'm a selfish barstard aren't I?

      Delete
  4. Awesome post Anne, I loved seeing one of the guys asking "is she drunk?" like that's not the world's most obvious question, O'Leary Airline posts never fail to make my day haha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I haven't done one in a while so it just felt right.

      Delete
  5. Kick an Environazi in the crackers you'll feel a bit better, seriously don't be worrying about times and post only when you feel like it woman!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now we both know I don't do things the easy way when I can do them the hard way and make myself miserable in the process. It's just not the Irish way.

      Delete
    2. I can't say he's right in public because then he'd have the upper hand and I'd never get it back!!

      Delete
  6. A funny post Anne. Like your sensahuma!

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  7. I'm sorry Anne, but propelling yourself through the sky in a chariot not drawn by a beast of burden is tantamount to evil in my book.

    But yeah, screw Bono!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, but the animal rights activists are more dangerous than the environazi's, so what are ya gonna do.

      Bono is a right arse!

      Delete
  8. How can O'leary Air be accused of such nonsense? You have the best airline that money could buy! All airlines should model their organizations according to yours.

    However, you should hire a public relations rep... passing out at every press conference gives you a bad image.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Passing out drunk gets me covered by the press and that's free advertising. I'm a feckin' genius!!

      Delete
    2. Fair enough. But still hire a public relations rep, get drunk at the press conferences, beat the hell out of your rep, then pass out!

      We are all suckers for that free advertising! lol Shameful indeed!

      Delete
    3. I'll hire you if you put me at the top of the Wall of Shame. I'm far more disgusting than those wankers at ABFTS!!!

      Delete
  9. Although you've been telling us all along, I'm starting to think you maybe a little cuckoo!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Of course I'm cuckoo Ray. Cuckoo as a clock I am!

      Delete
  10. Sleep tight and I despise Bono too and Sting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too, they're such pretentious twits. Instead of trying to "save the world" they should be trying to make music that doesn't make me want to claw my eyes out.

      Delete
  11. There's always some shenanigans at the Shenanigans Pub :)

    I applaud at each post that connects pope's picture and cow's farting :) Oh, so, blasphemous of me, will I be sent to Hell to be worshipped by muscled devils there? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Of course you will darling and they'll be sweaty and wearing short-shorts because it's hot. I'll come down from Heaven and hose them off for you from time to time.

      Delete
    2. oh, you're such a sweetheart for doing that :)

      Delete
  12. That was funny, Anne. Great pics, too. Don't worry about posting times, I'll read your blog whenever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Joe. And hey, when are you going to do another post? Waiting to see more zombie action at your place.

      Delete
  13. Feck the environazi's indeed. It's trash like them that make me want to saw the mufflers off my muscle car and just roar around town belching black smoke.

    Also, worry you not about blogging frequency, my dear friend, because we'll be here to read your posts whether you post twice a week or twice a month! Family always comes first!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I bought a Humvee and attached a missile launcher to the top and painted a picture of Al Gore on the side of it just to piss 'em off!!

      Delete
  14. Those environazi's are such a pain, on the ears. Just listening to their talk would drive anyone to drink..haha...yeah life comes first. So go ahead and post or comment when you can and don't force it, not much fun when one does that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Today is better, I'm rested now and will have time to go out and mow the lawn. After that, I'm drinking!!

      Delete
    2. I hate mowing the lawn, but it beats shoveling snow any day.

      Delete
  15. I giggled all the way through this post! Priceless! Sorry I've been such a loser with commenting, I've had head-up-arse-itis lately! I hope it fecks off soon! Love you. :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. We love ya Anne, you crazy evil environment destroying person you. Don't worry so much about times and everything, I think you've earned the right to take time to yourself and your hubby.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ah, I do enjoy a visit from the drunken CEO of O'Leary Air. Always enjoyable. "Where they copulate in the interests of pan-European peace." Priceless. Too funny. And no worries about your posting/commenting, I'll enjoy them whenever they come out.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Your "The assembled press looked on in horror" line gave me a good laugh.

    As a sometimes air traveler myself, I think the benefit of high speed air travel out weighs the environmental cost of burning jet fuel.

    ReplyDelete
  19. You made a weird request, I laughed. Try me in for Halle Berry, yeh? Lolll

    ReplyDelete
  20. LOL, I'd travel O'leary's air-planes any day!
    Seems like a load of fun.


    Following.

    http://ladyofmuse.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  21. This great!!! I love reading your stories :) Just keep blaming the cattle! Why don't you really get those envionazi's going and fly the cattle around? That'll be double the emissions. LOL

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  22. the picture of the cow lol... I cant believe farmers are charged for the large amount of methane gas produced by cows.

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  23. These are pretty cool pictures. Some of them had me laughing so hard that I couldn't breath. Nice post and blog.

    www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

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  24. Point me in the direction of this Stewart Jeffbaggy and I'll take up smoking cigarettes again and blow the smoke right in his face!!! Cancer be damned! How dare he insult my Lady Anne.

    Take care of you and your hubby. We'll be here when you're ready. Family first. Always - Love you, Anne <3

    ReplyDelete
  25. he he.. oh yes we like a rant at envorinazie treehuggers.. now if only you could have got the bloody pointless wind turbines that don;t work when it is too windy or not windy enough... oh we need a real power station just in case.. jees..

    ReplyDelete
  26. I'm sad to hear things are very busy in your house, good luck on keeping up with the blogging! But don't forget to put your family first!

    I've already noticed your absense on blogger! But its all good, knowing your at home with your family, is so much more important!

    ReplyDelete

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